Letting Go

 Why is it that we are so quick to jump feet first in love the minute someone we feel is special shows up? No one really knows, We just know that we do it, Right? So, let's do this.... Figure out why it's NOT so easy to just Let Go!

 Is it possible to fall in love in just a few short days? I would say so..In years past I would Completely disagree. But recently, I found myself becoming one of those "silly girls" that I used to make fun of. I guess I am just caught up in the day to day of wanting to be with someone so badly it hurts. It has been almost 2 years since my Husband and I separated. So, in turn, it has been almost 2 years since I let someone in...since I really let someone into my heart. To know what it truly means to understand me and to know me on a personal level is a tough challenge. I 'm definitely not one to let my guard down easily. But when I finally do, you have every part of me. You have my heart, my trust, my hope, You have Forever with me. (If you want it.)

 Can someone help me understand why something that feels so incredibly never ending and perfect would or could just fall apart in such a short amount of time? That is something I will Never and Could never understand. You dump all of your heart and trust into someone only to have them crush you. Why is it that we are to blind to see that they wait until they have us right where We  want to be, with them,  and when your heart is over flowing with love for that person, they Crush you.

 In turn we are left to pick up the pieces of our heart. With not alot of answers or closure. So, my challenge to you is this....If you have an answer for this, Feel Free to respond to my Blog. Because right now, I definitely could use some help. I am hurting worse than I ever imagined possible. It hasn't been long, but my feelings run deep. Is it because I have known him since we were kids? Probably....But things are different now. Neither of us are the same people, and that is something that I have to come to terms with. No one can get through this but myself.

 I am a strong, confident and smart Woman, Mother and Entrepeneur. I will bounce back, I always do.

"Courage is the power to let go of the familiar."
~Raymond Lindquist~

To love is to let go.

   Recently I have been faced with numerous challenges. My life is spinning out of control, faster than I can get a hold on it. I'm about to become a single mother of a 16 month old little boy. We are moving to Atlanta to make a new life for ourselves. I have had no luck finding a job here in good ole Ringgold, Ga. So, I figured why not? Now is as good a time as any.....

   This week has been the most trying one for me in months. There have been so many ups and downs. I have been so excited for the move and so incredibly saddened at the same time. Thru everything that has gone on I have managed to both gain friends and loose them. One was very dear to me. You could even say more like a sister. I thought friends were there to help you thru the hard times, not leave you.  I am so torn because I truly feel as if I am doing the right thing for Brantley and I. I just wish that there was a way for me to help them see it too.

    I know I haven't been as strong as I should be lately...but sometimes people loose site of whats important. I think I have pretty much mentally checked out. I am quickly learning how to get that back on track. I am determined and focused to put my life back together. No more excuses, no more loosing friends, no more family being disappointed. It's time for Me to get my life back on track. Starting Yesterday.

Quote of the Day : "Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets." ~Arthur Miller

Monday Monday...Dah dah dah dah.

Have you ever just had one of those days? You know...the kind where you just wanted the day to be over before it even got Started? Well...I'm right there with you this morning! I had a Dr's appt. scheduled for 8am in Knoxville this morning. Which meant that I needed to be up by 5am and out of the house NO later than 630am. Did that happen?? Not a chance! I am typically a night owl and cannot make myself go to sleep before around 2am. Why did I think last night was going to be any different? I made myself go to bed around 1030pm last night...and woke again at 1230am. Wouldn't you know that I did NOT go back to bed until somewhere around 430am. Knowing that I needed to be up in 30 minutes, one would have thought that I would have just stayed awake! Nope...I decided to take a quick nap. No good for me! I woke this morning at 815 am! 15 Minutes after my appointment should have began. This makes for a horrible start to the day! Which leads me to ask....What happened to my trusty alarm clock? I know I set it for the correct time! Is it possible that I incoherently shut the damn thing off while trying to catch up on Sleep?? Maybe. Anything is possible....Hahahahahaha. Well, I guess I am done with my rant for the day! On to bigger and better things...Like trying to land a J.O.B.! That would make this day perfect! Hope you all have a wonderful Monday!

Thought for the day: Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.

Sunshine and Summertime

   Well the Summer's almost over and it's definately been a roller coaster. Full of ups and downs and turns of all sorts. Never would I have imagined the things I have encountered this season. Some doors have been opened and some have been slammed in my face. But, I guess so is Life...right? It goes on. Or at least that's what I keep telling myself. I have had the best time meeting some Amazing people this Summer. And for that, I am truely greatful. While my life was falling apart God had a plan all along. He sent me the people I needed at just the right times. It's funny how God is very rarely early....But NEVER late. He knows exactly the right time for things.....If only I had that power. The power to see just what I needed and when I needed it. Life would be so much easier. It's been a rough road but things are looking up! I am optimistic about where my life is heading. All I need is my Faith, Family and Friends...It's definately the "Triple Threat." Without these 3 things Sunshine and Summertime would have never happened! <3

Quote for the Day: "There shall be eternal summer in the grateful heart."  ~Celia Thaxter

Definition of a Friend

                                          F orever by your side.

                                          R espectful and respectable.

                                          I  nspiring beyond all measures.

                                          E ndearing and encouraging.

                                          N ever judgemental, always supportive.

                                          D evoted to compromise.

 

  
  A forever friend is something we rarely run across these days. Society is to caught up in the "what's good for me now." I refuse to beg for friends....it should just happen. They should be willing to give as much of them to you as you are willing to give to them. I've found a "forever friend" recently. He never ceases to amaze me. His gentle ways and kind, compassionate heart are exactly what I have needed. I can't wait to see what waits just around the corner for us. He is not selfish, but rather selfless. Always puts others feelings before his own....Even though sometimes he stresses too much because of it. We laugh together...and lord knows I've cried. I'm comfortable telling him anything in the world. And having that comfort from someone is Priceless. Thank you for being such an AMAZING person and friend to me. You truly are a role model and Inspiration to me. And that respect for you grows more and more every day.

 Do you believe absence makes the heart grow fonder??? Even if you have Never physically touched? Is it possible to long for the touch of a hand of which you have never felt? These are the questions I keep asking myself...Call me crazy. I will admit that I am half of the time. :) But I believe it is possible....I believe anything is possible. Why live life in "negative Nancy" mode all the time?

I long to hear your voice and wait to see your face. I want to feel your skin against me when I sleep. When we talk it's like magic....I can only think of you. So, I sit and I wait and I hope....better yet I know, that one day things will be different. Life will be perfect because I will have you in it.

Until then....all I have are dreams and hopes.

"I'll take off my Halo, if you take off your Wings....Because you take me to heaven just by being You."

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?

   Of course we can! But, who are we kidding? Do we really believe in wishing on shooting stars? I know I don't put much stock in a wish anymore. If I had everything I wished for in life....things would be Amazing. Currently...things aren't the greatest, but I keep telling myself that they could be much worse. Someone Always has it worse than the next person. So...with that being said.

   Great things are happening in my life right now....I know I have been away for a while. So I am using this post to catch up. I am in the middle of a divorce....It's the best decision I think I have ever made. For my own happiness. I am finally learning that it is truly up to me to make things happen for myself...whether that be  finding a job, taking care of my son to the best of my ability, focusing on my family and friends, and getting my life right, whatever that entails.Now....hopefully along the way of this I can find Mr. Wonderful. I know, I know...kind of soon. But, I am most certainly not going to push him away, should he come knocking on my door. Take things slow....that's what I keep telling myself. No rushing...take time. The time to truly know him...and so that he can truly know me. This time I will get it right. I want that everlasting love...the once in a lifetime thing that every littel girl dreams of. I know he is out there...for all I know, I have already met him.

Thought for the day :  Why were we given 2 legs to walk, 2 arms to hold with, 2 eyes to see with, but only 1 heart? Because the other was given to someone for us to find. It's up to us...and only us to be Patient and Never settle. Wait for that one....you will know when you have them. And when you do....Do everything in your power to hang on.

" The most important thing in life, is to learn to give out Love, and to let it come in."